i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
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