Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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