rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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