I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
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