pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
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