She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
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