It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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