Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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