Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize