During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize