two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
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