remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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