Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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