I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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