sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize