i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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