we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
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