You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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