oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize