I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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