$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Randomize