whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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