I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
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He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
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Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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