We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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