kristin has been a bad kristin
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Randomize