It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize