dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
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nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
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watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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