The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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