Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Can I color on your dick again?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Randomize