and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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