'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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