Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
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