dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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