Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize