I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
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he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
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So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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