I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize