My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize