i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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