I'm laying in your front yard are you home
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize