i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize