did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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