we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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