I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Randomize