It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I just pynch a tree in the face
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, beer. Big fan.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Randomize