he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize