Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Randomize