I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Randomize