Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize