my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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