She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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